I've had many hobbies, interests, obsessions, and fixations over the years. Too many to list.
I would notice that when I picked up a new fixation, I would immediately see things related to it all over the place. This would lead to incredible outcomes in my life.
Like when I switched my college major to music, related job listings would jump out at me on Craigslist. This landed me a job as a music teacher at a "school of Rock."
When I started learning about personal finance, I noticed areas in my life where I could save money. I became obsessed and paid off my student loan within a year.
While reading about personal style, I could not help but notice the choices people made. I’m now able to help friends and family who ask me for help with their outfits for a wedding, job interview, and general style.
I notice this on a regular basis: become obsessed and opportunities pop up.
Why does this happen?
It's known as "frequency illusion."
"Frequency illusion (also known as the Baader–Meinhof phenomenon) is a cognitive bias in which a person notices a specific concept, word, or product more frequently after recently becoming aware of it."¹
When you find a new word, learn a new idea, or discover a thing, your reticular activating system marks it as "important."
A common occurrence of this is when we're in the market for a product (a new car, a new jacket, camera equipment, or whatever). We begin noticing it (or comparable products) all around us.
This little-known part of your brain is responsible for this phenomenon, and it's holding you back from accomplishing your goals.
But we’re going to change that…
It Cuts Both Ways
The "reticular activating system (RAS)" is a net-like structure within the brainstem. It's responsible for sorting 100 million impulses of sensory input per second.
When it comes to our desires and goals, the most relevant aspect of the RAS is its filtering function. It filters inputs for important information. Information related to our values and objectives.
Let's say you establish the goal of a healthy lifestyle. Your RAS will filter in information around you that is relevant to this goal. You'll start to notice related posts on social media. You'll pick up on conversations related to your understanding of "healthy lifestyle."
This is obviously very helpful.
But, the RAS is a double-edged sword.
It can be an unconscious source of frustration when it isn't primed with intention.
Sensory gating is the main role of the RAS. This study² proposes that it helps identify unimportant information. This way, we focus less on unimportant information and more on what matters to our goals.
If you don’t prime your RAS for what is important, you won’t perceive the opportunities that are relevant to you. And it gets worse: distractions will pull you away from what is actually important to you.
Do you see the problem?
It's two-fold:
- You're missing helpful information and opportunities to help you progress toward your goals.
- And you're also distracted by irrelevant input around you.
A double dose of misalignment!
Your RAS still filters "important" information—even if you haven't set an intention. But you're paying more attention to things that don't actually matter to you.
Bias: Confirmed
It can also limit your personal growth.
The RAS prioritizes information that confirms existing beliefs, whether positive or negative. It's a neutral yet powerful arbiter of confirmation bias.
The RAS contributes to confirmation bias by filtering reality through belief-aligned attention.
Confirmation bias is the behavior of prioritizing information that supports one's existing beliefs.
If you have the thought, "I'm not smart,"—and believe it (i.e., you accept the thought as "truth"). Your RAS will emphasize information around you that supports that claim.
You notice others answering questions faster than you. You think it means you’re less intelligent, even though your thoughts are valuable and take time to share.
You make a small mistake on a task, and your mind fixates on it. Overlooking the 95% of the task you completed correctly. You see the single error as confirmation that you're "not smart."
You avoid participating in challenging conversations. When you hear unfamiliar vocabulary or concepts, you internalize it as, “See? I don't belong here,” instead of viewing it as an opportunity to learn.
Self-limiting beliefs do incredible damage to your self confidence.
Now think about some of the other things we say about ourselves.
"I'll never make that kind of money."
"They're talented. I could never do that!"
"I'm unattractive."
What information will your RAS filter to confirm those self-limiting beliefs?
Of course you aren’t making any progress! Your own brain is sabotaging you! More accurately, you're sabotaging yourself because you already have the power to prime your RAS but you aren’t.
Where there's a will, there's a way.
The RAS isn’t harmful—it’s more like a neutral tool shaped by your focus. By directing its filtering power, you can transform it from a saboteur into an ally for your growth.
You can train your RAS with deliberate practice using different methods. Visualization, affirmation, and setting intentions are especially effective.
Prime Time
Here is exactly what you can do to prime your RAS with a one-two combination of intent.
Regular visualization
Every month, practice picturing who you are becoming and the outcomes you desire.
If you've never created a vision for yourself, start by creating a "minimum viable vision." You can read more about that in this post.
You need to learn how to desire the right things for yourself. Nobody can tell you what the right things are except yourself. And, they're limited by what you are aware exists and believe is possible.
If you aren’t doing this, you will always get more of what you’ve already gotten.
Daily affirmation
You also need to train your self-talk.
First, start by paying attention to the phrases you say about yourself. When they come up, take a note of these on your phone or a journal.
Decide: do you want the outcomes inevitable to those phrases?
No?
Then don't accept them as truths, and start saying the inverse. You can use ChatGPT (or something similar) to help you phrase any self-limiting belief.
Here are some examples.
- "I don’t have what it takes." → "I can develop what it takes through action and persistence."
- "I don’t have the discipline." → "Discipline is built like a muscle—by using it."
- “The conditions aren’t right.” → “Conditions rarely feel perfect. Progress happens when you move anyway.”
- “This is way too complicated.” → “It feels complex now, but breaking it into parts will make it manageable.”
Now that you have your new beliefs, at least once-a-day look at your list of phrases and read them to yourself. Some people might feel awkward doing it out loud, but you can do this out loud or in your mind. Works either way.
I like to set up nudges in my environment and on my person to trigger my new affirmations.
You may have a lifetime of self-limiting beliefs that you need to correct. Overtime, one-by-one you’ll undo each of them.
Do this long enough and you’ll melt away all the negative talk and learn to think in plausibility and probability—by default.
The Short and Long of It
Your RAS is key for chasing short-term goals. It helps us focus on immediate objectives and filters information that comes our way.
Your RAS can be even more powerful for long-term ambitions. Remember, your RAS looks for things that match what you believe about yourself or any situation.
Your attention shapes your reality. Design wisely.
When you’re ready…
Create your minimum viable vision with this framework: https://houseofthen.com/blogs/the-directive/a-framework-for-creating-a-vision
Learn how to set up nudges for your RAS: https://houseofthen.com/blogs/the-directive/the-art-of-habit-formation-using-nudge-theory-to-create-lasting-change-in-your-life
References
- Frequency illusion - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frequency_illusion
- "Cognitive mechanisms associated with auditory sensory gating." - https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4727785/#s0145